Dealing with temper tantrums can be very frustrating and challenging for parents to handle, but the good news is that tantrums can be easily prevented. I know that this sounds almost impossible but it is very much true, the reason why temper tantrums reoccur and become more challenging is usually due to our response to them.

Temper Tantrums

Temper tantrums are considered normal in toddlers since they are still learning how to cope with their emotions. The frequency should reduce as the child gets older. How we respond to them is a game-changer.

When your child is having a tantrum, it is extremely important that you stay calm. I know that this is not a natural response we have when a tantrum occurs and very often, we will be drawn into disciplining our child immediately. However, we should approach our children slowly, we should always get down at their eye level when talking to them, and avoid using lots of words, because toddlers can’t process so much information at once, especially while they are emotional.

Understanding your child's emotions

Keep it simple, acknowledge your child’s emotion. Slip that NO which can cause the tantrum in the first place between the lines. You can simply say “Hey, I know you are upset for not going to the play area, let’s go home and see what time mommy is free, so we can go there some other day. I am really looking forward to it ”.

Acknowledging emotion and letting them know that you are looking forward to spending time with them, even though at that moment you are unable to go to the play area - will help your children connect with you and understand what they want now is not something you necessarily don’t want to do, but it’s something that you are unable to do at the moment.

“Keep it simple, acknowledge your child’s emotion.”

If your child bites you or hits you, or bites someone else around you, like a sibling or a peer, you should approach your child in a calm manner as well. This time you should focus on behaviour, so your conversation should have a different direction, like “Oo, I can see you are very upset with Mike for taking your toy. You should have asked for it, hitting is not nice, and it's not going to get your toy back."

Once the children are calm, we should talk to them and see what was the reason behind the behaviour. Introduce other options and ways they can take their toy back next time. Do not forget to mention to your child why it is important to apologise after such an incident.

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• Do not hit or bite back the child at any point - by doing this you are encouraging violence, and you are sending a message to your child - that this kind of behaviour is ok.
• Children should know that we love them no matter what, they should also be aware that we are not going to tolerate such behaviour either.
• Talk to your children about what is acceptable and unacceptable behaviour whenever you have a chance and do not forget that your actions speak louder than words.

Whenever your child has a difficult time regulating emotions remember that children should not feel that they get more of your attention by having a tantrum because this will just encourage them to repeat that again. Children don't mind if the attention they are getting from you is negative and not positive, so take a deep breath, wait for it to pass and find the right moment to discuss what has happened with your little one.Don’t give in, make sure your child is safe and look for a distraction "Hey, look at that boy, he has a lovely hat", it works almost every time.