Parenting is something which is defined differently by each parent and caregiver. Although the approach and the way we deal with our children may be unique to each parent and caregiver, we all have a tendency of adopting a singular or a variation of parenting styles when dealing with our children. When choosing your parenting style it is important to consider that the way you approach your child can affect their physical and mental development and shape them for a lifetime. Research has identified four types of parenting styles, each different and each with its own positives and negatives.
Authoritarian:
Parents who are authoritarian have a rigid approach to parenting and do not take their child's feelings into consideration. Children are meant to follow all the rules, behave as told, or be punished. Any questioning of parent's orders is usually responded with - “Because I told you so”. Negotiation is non-existent and obedience is the primary trait that is demanded from the child. When a child falls out of order, direct punishment is more often used than disciplining. Shaming and blaming children for what they have done is a common characteristic. Children that find themselves being parented in such a way usually develop self-esteem problems, tend to become aggressive, and develop coping mechanisms such as lying in order to avoid further punishment.
Authoritative:
This type of parenting sets rules and uses consequences in order to enforce them. The authoritative parents provide their children with an understanding of why such rules are in place and develop a clear hierarchy in a relationship, making clear that the adults are in charge. While they do take their children's opinions into account, they create a system of reinforced behaviour involving positive and negative consequences in accordance with the corresponding behaviour. Psychological research has found that children who experience an authoritative parenting style usually develop into responsible adults who are not afraid to voice their opinion and express their feelings, also, they tend to evaluate their decisions against the eventual outcome in order to avoid dangerous, and high-risk situations.
Permissive:
Parents who choose permissive parenting tend to set rules and boundaries that they seldomly enforce. This parenting style has a very relaxed approach, which tends to leave the child to its own devices, where the parent becomes an observer rather than a moderator, and consequences are almost never enforced for unacceptable behavior. The relationship is more of a friendly nature facilitated by open communication and low expectations. Children are mostly left to take their own decisions as no rules are available. Children who grow up under permissive parenting tend to grow up with poor self-control, egocentric behavior, and poor social skills.
“The authoritative parents provide their children with an understanding of why such rules are in place and develop a clear hierarchy in a relationship”
Uninvolved:
Uninvolved parents tend to be absent from their children's lives. They do not provide any guidance, support, or interest in what their child is doing, or how it feels. Parents usually show no emotional attachment to the child and often can be cold and unresponsive.
Children who grow up under such a parenting style can develop a multitude of psychological issues, they can choose delinquency, demonstrate impulsive behavior, have a higher tendency to develop drug dependency, and potentially develop suicidal thoughts.